So then to be at war with one another, is “to give place to the devil”; for, whereas we had need to be all in close array, and to make our stand against him, we have relaxed our enmity against him, and are giving the signal for turning against each other; for never has the devil such place as in our enmities. Numberless are the evils thence produced. And as stones in a building, so long as they are closely fitted together and leave no interstice, will stand firm, while if there is but a single needle's passage through, or a crevice no broader than a hair, this destroys and ruins all; so is it with the devil. So long indeed as we are closely set and compacted together, he cannot introduce one of his wiles; but when he causes us to relax a little, he rushes in like a torrent. In every case he needs only a beginning, and this is the thing which it is difficult to accomplish; but this done, he makes room on all sides for himself. For henceforth he opens the ear to slanders, and they who speak lies are the more trusted: they have enmity which plays the advocate, not truth which judges justly. And as, where friendship is, even those evils which are true appear false, so where there is enmity, even the false appear true. There is a different mind, a different tribunal, which does not hear fairly, but with great bias and partiality. As, in a balance, if lead is cast into the scale, it will drag down the whole; so is it also here, only that the weight of enmity is far heavier than any lead. Wherefore, let us, I beseech you, do all we can to extinguish our enmities before the going down of the sun. For if you fail to master it on the very first day, both on the following, and oftentimes even for a year, you will be protracting it, and the enmity will thenceforward augment itself, and require nothing to aid it. For by causing us to suspect that words spoken in one sense were meant in another, and gestures also, and everything, it infuriates and exasperates us, and makes us more distempered than madmen, not enduring either to utter a name, or to hear it, but saying everything in invective and abuse. How then are we to allay this passion? How shall we extinguish the flame? By reflecting on our own sins, and how much we have to answer for to God; by reflecting that we are wreaking vengeance, not on an enemy, but on ourselves; by reflecting that we are delighting the devil, that we are strengthening our enemy, our real enemy, and that for him we are doing wrong to our own members. Would you be revengeful and be at enmity? Be at enmity, but be so with the devil, and not with a member of your own. For this purpose it is that God has armed us with anger, not that we should thrust the sword against our own bodies, but that we should baptize the whole blade in the devil's breast. There bury the sword up to the hilt; yea, if you will, hilt and all, and never draw it out again, but add yet another and another. And this actually comes to pass when we are merciful to those of our own spiritual family and peaceably disposed one towards another. Perish money, perish glory and reputation; my own member is dearer to me than they all. Thus let us say to ourselves; let us not do violence to our own nature to gain wealth, to obtain glory.
Ver. 28. “Let him that stole,” says he, “steal no more.”
Do you see what are the members of the old man? Falsehood, revenge, theft. Why said he not, “Let him that stole” be punished, be tortured, be racked; but, “let him steal no more”? “But rather let him labor, working with his hands the thing that is good, that he may have whereof to give to him that has need.”
Where are they which are called pure; they that are full of all defilement, and yet dare to give themselves a name like this? For it is possible, very possible, to put off the reproach, not only by ceasing from the sin, but by working some good thing also. Perceive ye how we ought to get quit of the sin? “They stole.” This is the sin. “They steal no more.” This is not to do away the sin. But how shall they? If they labor, and charitably communicate to others, thus will they do away the sin. He does not simply desire that we should work, but so “work” as to “labor,” so as that we may “communicate” to others. For the thief indeed works, but it is that which is evil.
Ver. 29. “Let no corrupt speech proceed out of your mouth.”
What is “corrupt speech”? That which is said elsewhere to be also “idle, backbiting, filthy communication, jesting, foolish talking.” See ye how he is cutting up the very roots of anger? Lying, theft, unseasonable conversation. The words, however, “Let him steal no more,” he does not say so much excusing them, as to pacify the injured parties, and to recommend them to be content, if they never suffer the like again. And well too does he give advice concerning conversation; inasmuch as we shall pay the penalty, not for our deeds only, but also for our words.
“But such as is good,” he proceeds, “for edifying, as the need may be, that it may give grace to them that hear.”
That is to say, What edifies your neighbor, that only speak, not a word more. For to this end God gave you a mouth and a tongue, that you might give thanks to Him, that you might build up your neighbor. So that if you destroy that building, better were it to be silent, and never to speak at all. For indeed the hands of the workmen, if instead of raising the walls, they should learn to pull them down, would justly deserve to be cut off. For so also says the Psalmist; “The Lord shall cut off all flattering lips.” The mouth—this is the cause of all evil; or rather not the mouth, but they that make an evil use of it. From thence proceed insults, revilings, blasphemies, incentives to lusts, murders, adulteries, thefts, all have their origin from this. And how, you will say, do murders? Because from insult you will go on to anger, from anger to blows, from blows to murder. And how, again, adultery? “Such a woman,” one will say, “loves you, she said something nice about you.” This at once unstrings your firmness, and thus are your passions kindled within you.
Therefore Paul said, “such as is good.” Since then there is so vast a flow of words, he with good reason speaks indefinitely, charging us to use expressions of that kind, and giving us a pattern of communication. What then is this? By saying, “for edifying,” either he means this, that he who hears you may be grateful to you: as, for instance, a brother has committed fornication; do not make a display of the offense, nor revel in it; you will be doing no good to him that hears you; rather, it is likely, you will hurt him, by giving him a stimulus. Whereas, advise him what to do, and you are conferring on him a great obligation. Discipline him how to keep silence, teach him to revile no man, and you have taught him his best lesson, you will have conferred upon him the highest obligation. Discourse with him on contrition, on piety, on almsgiving; all these things will soften his soul, for all these things he will own his obligation. Whereas by exciting his laughter, or by filthy communication, you will rather be inflaming him. Applaud the wickedness, and you will overturn and ruin him.
Or else he means thus, “that it may make them, the hearers, full of grace.” For as sweet ointment gives grace to them that partake of it, so also does good speech. Hence it was moreover that one said, “Your name is as ointment poured forth.” It caused them to exhale that sweet perfume. You see that what he continually recommends, he is saying now also, charging every one according to his several ability to edify his neighbors. Thou then that givest such advice to others, how much more to yourself!
Ver. 30. “And grieve not,” he adds, “the Holy Spirit of God.”
Source: Homilies on Ephesians (New Advent)